It was a core needle biopsy, which is more conclusive than a fine needle biopsy because it takes out more flesh for the pathology department to pathologize.
Fred and I went to the drugstore to get a Valium and I took it about 40 minutes before the biopsy was to take place, we also stopped at Marshalls to pick up a lavender eye pillow to wear so I would not have to look at the huge needle entering my boob.
I laid on the table and Fred waited in the waiting room (the surgeon said that a husband once, holding his wife's hand fainted while watching a procedure and Fred is not fond of needles). My eye pillow firmly over my eyes and my hand clasping that of a lovely nurse named Katie, I waited skittishly (not sure if the Valium was working) for the numbing needle. It came with a pinch and a growing burning sensation. The surgeon asked if I could feel a pin prick and I could, so she added more lidocaine to the area. Then she nipped a piece of skin off and pushed the large needle into the supposedly numbed area. I heard a staple gun sound and did not have too much pain. That is the noise it makes when they clamp out a bit of your flesh. The second time (I thought there would only be one time, alas) it hurt and I hunched my shoulders up and said "ouch" loudly and wondered aloud if this would be the last time.
(This seems to be the time that all of the niceness leaves the surgeons and they begin to hard talk to you about whether or not we want this all to happen again or if they can just finish. I know because it happened yesterday and the last time I got traumatically biopsied in 2004, when I wanted them to stop too, but even more did not want it to happen again.)
It was not the last time, the third time did not hurt but the fourth time did. A lot. Imagine an insect inside of your flesh taking a big bite out of the inside of your very sensitive nipple. That is what it felt like. I was crying by then and felt all sweaty. Fred came in and comforted me and then I got dressed and left.
The surgeon said that her patients said that they thought the biopsy was more painful than surgery. I think that is only because you are awake for the biopsy and know what is happening and can feel pain. The after part was fine. Of course I am not touching the area at all, but I am not feeling anything. I took a few advil yesterday just in anticipation, but don't think I needed it. I think the surgeon just wants me to get surgery and that is why she said that. I am suspicious of her motives.
I am looking for a good surgeon and plastic surgeon and getting names from people, I don't want to question the motives or the skills of the person who will actually do the double mastectomy in January as I do the one I saw yesterday.
I was reading on a breast cancer discussion site about what the expander situation is like. It sounds pretty painful for many, so am a little nervous.
I should know the results of the biopsy by Friday or Monday at the latest.
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